


Excuses and Apologies

by LordTraco



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: But is still terrible, Linda gets a sad backstory, PTA Sans, Remembering Resets, Some Swearing, alcohol mention
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-07
Updated: 2017-04-25
Packaged: 2018-05-05 09:30:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,111
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5370320
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LordTraco/pseuds/LordTraco
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chara used to be the one Sans hated most in the Underground, but up here on the surface, Linda is the one he hates with everything he's got. The PTA mom is the worst, but...<br/>A certain tale of hers hits quite close to home.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Linda

**Author's Note:**

> Because of course it is my duty to add sad tales to every fandom/au I find, here's a headcanon to make you feel somewhat bad for Linda. Somewhat.

Grillby never called him… Grillby never had to call Sans, why would he? Sans came there just about every day regardless, hell, it was usually Papyrus Grillby had to call when Sans had a bit too much to drink and didn’t feel like walking home.

But here it was, a call from Grillby at 9 o’clock at night, right after Sans had finished reading his bro and his kid a bedtime story. Sans could care less what any legal documents said, Frisk was his child, plain and simple. Toriel was the sole legal guardian of Frisk according to the paperwork, and since neither himself nor Asgore had really brought up the idea of dating since she hadn’t seemed all too interested…

Sans broke out of his musings and answered the call. He didn’t need any intermediary to understand Grillby’s speech, which was good because the bartender told him in hushed tones that he needed help with a certain customer… human.

“I’ll be right over!” Sans said, ending the call and firing off a text to Toriel that Frisk and Papyrus were asleep and that he needed to go out for a while. She was likely back in the living room by the fireplace, but that was at the opposite end of their huge house. Grillby had sounded urgent…

His phone buzzed the moment he left the house.

_Be back by 11._

_ok_

It was a short walk even without shortcuts, but Sans used them anyways, heading into the woods and walking towards a tree until suddenly he was walking up to the front door of Grillbys. Opening the door, he noticed a lot of familiar faces from the underground, and a few new faces, mostly of monsters who had lived in Hotland and the capital. But one stood out.

“Oh fuck no…” He muttered. There sat Linda… plastered drunk on a stool at the front of the bar. She was the last human in the world he wanted to see in the best of conditions, and these were anything but.

“Eyyyyy S-saaansy pansy” Sans could only cringe as the lanky woman swayed drunkenly, attempting to point at him but failing a good 80% of the time. “Who’da thunk you’d be a drunkard? Wai… wait’ll the others… wait’ll they hear”

Sans kept a steady smile on his face as he approached, not too hard considering that simply was his face. The other regulars gave the two of them peculiar looks.

“Why are you here, Linda?” He asked, his tone as smooth as gravel. “You hate monsters.”

“Yah but Grills is the best… nobody I’d know’ll find me here, n’ all a’ you won’t lay a finger on a human in case’a startin som… somethin…” She rambled, then turned away, her face dropping. “I ain’t pretty by human standards, so I’m a tub a’ ugly in here, safe as hell.” She took another swig of her drink.

Sans didn’t like this. This foul woman was against every liberty that existed for monsters and humans that thought any differently than she did. She blackmailed the other moms into agreeing with her most of the time, and emotionally manipulated the remaining. He despised her rotten existence and all the trouble she put his child through just because she could.

But right now, she wasn’t the prideful woman that constantly disregarded the basic code of decency on a daily basis. She was…

She was crying.

Damn his fucking nonexistent but still caring heart.

“Linda.”

“Hey… since I got some juice on you… c’n I… it’s only fair you have something over my head hangin too.” She slurred, but Sans could feel her calming down some.

“Linda you’ve got to get home. Grillby won’t give you anymore. And our alcohol is stronger than-“

“Sure sure. Jus’ one story.” She waved her hand at him and then patted the stool next to her. Sighing, Sans contemplated just grabbing her and teleporting her home. But curiosity nagged at him and forced him into sitting next to Linda.

 

…

 

Sans began to wonder if she was even drunk as she locked eyes with him for a moment. Her swaying had stopped completely, and her eyes looked far too aware. Sans recalled the “placebo effect” and glanced to her drink, suspecting Grillby knew this customer’s limit a little too well.

“I ever tell you about the time my husband left me?” Before he could respond, she let out a pitiful giggle. “Rhetorical question,” She muttered, “I never told anyone about that damn week. The week that kept happening… over and over…”

Sans stiffened, eyes shooting back to Linda’s fearfully. “Over and over?”

“First time he cheated on me and I kicked him out. We fought over Tommy and he won just as you monsters came out.” She said, eyes looking past him. “Then I woke up next to him, we were still together, no monsters… I freaked out, he left me, called me insane, took Tommy…”

“Linda…”

“It went over and over. Sometimes no monsters came out, sometimes I cheated on him, sometimes I won custody, sometimes Tommy-“ A sob caught in her throat.

“What?”

“I made sure after that one I focused on Tommy. I couldn’t fix the marriage, but I could keep Tommy and make him happy. Then it finally stopped and I could move on… but I can’t know for sure. I’ll never know for sure that I won’t just… wake up next to my ex all over again… and lose my son and husband again…”

“It won’t happen again.” Sans’ eyes had turned to the single blue one out of fear. How could she remember the resets? Why? Linda didn’t seem to hear him.

“I spoil my son rotten… and then go get drunk to forget for a little while… What has my life become…?”

Sans put a heavy hand on her shoulder, forcing her out of her slight trance to look at him seriously. “It won’t reset anymore. Ever. Trust me.”

That’s when the torrent of tears started to flow. She shoved her arms around him, hugging him tightly, which was quite awkward and painful from the stools. Sans pushed her away after a moment. Sob-story or not, he hated this woman with a passion.

“I’m…” She shoved her hands onto her face and put her elbows on the counter to cover her face from him.

“What?”  
“I’m sorry.” She said softly.

“For what?” _Letting your son bully my child? Getting back at me by making Frisk’s life miserable in school with rules specifically against them? Making my brother cry by telling him how awful his pasta was?_ Sans yearned to say all of that, but held back.

“I had a dream that… Frisk and you monsters made those resets happen. I’ve… been cruel over some stupid dream…” she sighed, standing up from the stool. “I shouldn’t hate a whole race over some dream involving a talking flower.”

Sans stopped dead in his tracks. But she was holding out her hand to him.

“I should hate you individually for being jerks." She wiped away her tears on her sleeves. "Now walk me home and... I’ll pay you back with my recipe for ketchup cake.”

“Ketchup… cake?” Well that won out as the most unbelievable thing he’d heard tonight.

“Found it online.” She shrugged.

“Then I can look it up myself.” Sans gave her a hard glare.

“Oh hush you know you’re too much of a gentleman to let me walk there alone. And Grillby trusts you.”

“Wait…” San’s eyes went dark. “You aren’t drunk at all, are you?”

“Probably not. Grillby just fills my cup and lets me act as drunk as I please. I told him I needed someone to talk to and guess who shows up?” She still had her hand out to Sans.

“Ugh…” Sans took her hand to help get out of the stool, wishing he could be drunk now and not have to feel so conflicted over such a terrible person. Chara at least had the decency not to be this difficult to hate!


	2. A Walk Down Memory Lane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sans walks Linda back to her house, and learns they share a few more things in common. But at least he can go back to hating the jerk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so the chapter name is a reference to a pun my brother made... because literally a block away from my house is this tiny street called "Memory Lane" and he once took his girlfriend on a walk down Memory Lane. It was cheesy. (My brother is the best and he's basically Sans)
> 
> Theeeese memories are a little less pleasant though.

“So…” Linda started, once they were a few steps out the door from Grillby’s. She waited for Sans to walk by her side, but he didn’t move. “Look I want to talk to you while we walk, please?” She sounded exhausted, no doubt from the emotions she’d just spilled out back at the bar.

Sans didn’t move. It was all he could do just to stand there and not let his eyes turn blue again. Pity and hatred fought back and forth in his head.

“Look.” Her voice became as curt and rude as he remembered. She stood up straight, nose slightly up, the air around her almost magically turning icy as she assumed her usual aura of snooty arrogance. “I’m still me. I still can’t stand you or your kid.” That was new. Usually she would call Frisk by name, as if there were no relation between the two of you.

“You remember the resets.” Sans said quietly. Those resets haunted him as well… that’s what was bothering him. Linda was haunted by the same thing he was…

“I don’t talk about that stuff outside of Grillby’s. Now come along.” She said in her usual condescending tone, starting to walk off without him.

“You can’t just-“

“I can and will.”

Sans held back an angry growl and ran a little to catch up with the infuriating woman.

“I go there every Tuesday night for two hours after Tommy is asleep.”

“You do know beer has gluten in it, don’t you?” Sans quipped.

“So does your brother’s pasta. I make exceptions.”

“Exceptions so you can RUIN my brother’s DAY!!!” Sans all but growled.

“You’re not doing him any favors by LYING to him how great his food is! I spoil my kid rotten, but at least he doesn’t go out spouting how great his mushy, burnt pasta is!”

“YOU-“ Sans glared at her, unable to think of a witty comeback at that. Had he really spoiled his brother… after all those nightmares of losing him. “You don’t get it. H-he… he died in a lot of those resets.”

“So did Tommy.” She glared back. “I get it, we disagree on a LOT of things, you mon… skeleton… But all those snide remarks on how my son is terrible because of me? All those coy jokes about how my husband left me?” Tears were in her eyes again, but she was too busy pointing in a very angry motherly fashion towards you. “Those… those hurt.” Her glare faltered and she rubbed her eyes a little. “I won’t insult your brother if you’ll just… lay off the husband remarks at least.”

“Linda I…” Sans bit back an apology. It tasted like tar in his mouth. She didn’t deserve an apology from him. How could he have known? She’d done way worse. “It’s a deal.” There. No apology needed.

“But if he makes terrible pasta for our meetings one more time, I will find your house and teach him how to cook it myself if I have to!”

Was she… threatening with cooking lessons? Sans gave her a weird look, but she missed it, instead looking at her house they’d reached after their short walk.

“Hang on. I’ll go grab the recipe. Tommy printed it out to make some sort of zombie video game cake. I was going to throw it away and hope he doesn’t remember, but you’re… a better option.”

“A better option than a garbage can. Wow Linda, I never knew you were so good at flirting.” Sans deadpanned, taking the paper from her with the most unamused expression he could muster.

“Thank you for walking me back, goodnight.” And with that, she slammed the door on his face.

“Jerk!” He muttered, honestly a little glad to have reason to hate her again.

 

 

 

…….

 

 

 

On the other side of the door, Linda stood with her head against the doorway. She hadn’t flirted with Sans. No. But he knew about that week of… he called them ‘resets’. No that hadn’t been flirting she was just drunk. And emotional. But she’d opened up her darkest secrets to the most irritating creature on the planet and he’d… experienced it too.

He’d gone through it too and lost his brother.

Linda gazed up the stairs in the vague direction of her only child’s room. Tommy was likely up on his game boy or whatever that latest gadget she’d bought him was called. She was too drunk to remember.

Oh who was she kidding, there was no alcohol in her system. Grillby let her think she was drinking so that she’d be able to lose herself. It was easy to let herself go when she expected to be drunk. And the fact Grillby’s drinks always tasted… hot… from his magic or just the heat of the place, you could never tell if there was alcohol inside or not, it warmed you regardless.

Standing up straight, she pulled away from the wall and walked upstairs, stopping by Tommy’s room out of habit. He was still there.

Her son was still there, that’s all that mattered.

Was Sans doing the same, checking in on Papyrus?

She wasn't alone...

that... that mattered too. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I kinda sorta made the mistake of joking about shipping Linda x Sans... and am now playing around with the idea of Linda developing a... sort of crush on Sans? Or more accurately a desire to be friendly/motherly towards him, which is just as terrible in her mind. 
> 
> I've also got a question for you guys (Since oh my gosh there are PEOPLE THAT READ THIS),  
> Should I stick with Linda and develop her more, or introduce some of the other PTA moms? Because she's not the only one with secrets~
> 
>  
> 
> And since I know it's a little less intimidating (for me at least) to comment through Tumblr than on here...  
> LordTraco.tumblr.com  
> Ask/comment/send whatever you like. 
> 
> Thank you so so so so SO much for all the kudos! This is the first ever fanfic I've written for such a large fandom that has gotten so many views! Thank you all!


	3. Carol

Things had gone back to normal in time for the next PTA. Linda was her normal sassy self in Sans’ empty eyes.

“Look, all we’re saying is that MK and a few other monsters need some special attention and a separate class would make it easier to find out ways of accommodating them.” The teacher said calmly, eyes glancing over the monster parents’ distrustful faces. “It needn’t be for long, and we could set them up with aids once we know how best to…”

“Why not just put all the monsters in separate classrooms period?” Helen interrupted.

“No, that’s not-“ the teacher started.

“We don’t have enough classrooms for that.” Another teacher commented, clearly looking at Helen to try and stop her idea right then and there.

“Then build a new school!” Helen exclaimed.

“Humans and monsters already go to different grade schools.” Carol butted in.

“That wouldn’t work.” Linda said, her tone still as arrogant and condescending that Sans didn’t even notice she was actually dismissing the plan at all.

“Like your marriage.” He muttered, a nonexistent heartbeat before realizing he’d broken his deal already. Shooting Linda an apologetic gaze, but she didn’t see it.

“We don’t want another ‘high heel’ incident” Linda finished, still avoiding looking anywhere near Sans.

Everyone groaned. All of the kids loved the theatre teacher to death, and he was pretty much immune from any PTA decision ever. If they were to make a new school for only monsters, Mettaton would go there, and one could only imagine what kind of protest that would bring from the humans who loved their robotic-ghost teacher.

That ended that discussion. It was agreed that aids would be provided to some of the monster students who needed them.

…

“Sans, stop daydreaming and help me move this dang cart!” Carol yelled.

“But I thought you liked doing Cart-io exercises.” He said, grabbing the final few jugs of drinks from the minivan and putting them on the cart before pushing it towards the school. The meetings were usually catered, but this time everyone had pitched in some home-cooked meals and sent Sans and Carol to get the sodas. Sans because he was supposed to have brought the drinks and had only brought ketchup, and Carol because she needed to get the big rolling cart from her car anyways, and someone had to keep the skeleton from just buying more ketchup.

“Just shut up and push.” Sans’ permanent grin got just a tad bigger.

“Is that what the doctors told you when-“

“SHUT UP!”

Holding in most of the laughter bubbling inside of him at her flustered face, he checked off “birth puns” under his mental list of “what flusters Carol”. With that done, Sans began to push the cart with her towards the long ramp that lead to the school. It was a little unnecessary, especially when he could have just altered the cart’s gravity to make it fly up the stairs, but he didn’t feel like scaring the human… and he was lazy.

It didn’t take long to get into the building, but when they were there, Carol froze. “The meeting is on the second floor today. C’mon we gotta take the elevator.” Sans said, ignoring her.

“W-well I should… I should take the stairs and meet you up-“

“Carol the cart is heavy, you can run up and down the stairs all you like later.”  
“N-no I uh.” The elevator made a small ding as the doors opened and Sans watched a look of sheer panic cross her face.  
“Carol, it’s-“  
“I’LL MEET YOU UPSTAIRS!” Sprinting away towards the stairs, Carol’s heartrate tripled when she knocked into Sans upon turning a corner.

“Carol.” Sans caught her arm before she could fall over. “Breathe with me.”

The irony of that statement obviously wasn’t lost on either of them, but she did as instructed. They spent a solid minute just taking deep breaths, Sans emphasizing his breaths with a hand over where his stomach should be.

“Thank you.” Carol said finally, “I’m sorry I-“  
“Hi Sorry, I’m Sans.”

“Ugh…” She let out a small huff that was most definitely a well hidden laugh. Or at least Sans decided to take it that way.

“You go take the stairs, I’ll handle the cart.” Sans lightly patted her shoulder and walked back, only to pause a moment. “And Carol? I won’t press you but… If there’s a reason for that fear and you need someone to talk to? I’m all ears.”

“More like all bones.” Carol muttered with another huff, making her way away from him to the stairs. She hoped he hadn’t heard that.

But he did. Just like his brother, if there was a pun said in a 50 yard radius of him, he heard it. And it made him happy inside… before realizing that in the last week, he’d seen the terrible Linda cry and the adrenaline-addicted Carol have a panic attack. He knew humans weren’t 2-dimensional, and had complexities and hidden natures, but… It was just so much easier to label them as ignorant little evil things that were purposefully making life harder for his family and species. It was easier not to admit that they might have redeeming qualities than to…

Is that how they felt towards him?

Is that how they all felt towards monsters?

Were their perceptions changing just as much as his own?

Sans hoped so and distractedly lowered the gravity on the cart… Except not quite. He sort of reversed the gravity on accident and then slammed it back down. The sodas were going to get everywhere when they were opened, and he inwardly patted himself on the back for the inadvertent prank idea.

Actually lessening the gravity on the cart and taking the elevator to the next floor was easy, but he stopped with the magic as soon as the cart was out of the elevator. No sense in scaring anyone with a glowing blue eye… ok honestly he just felt like not being lazy if Carol could help him with the cart now.

Which she did a minute later. Neither of them spoke on the way to the meeting, but she did give him another grateful smile just before opening the door.

…

…

The carnage of the fizzing over sodas was less than Sans expected, but one of the other moms, Helen, did get some sprayed onto her blouse. So he counted it as a success.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well uh. This has been half done for a good... lot of months. Sorry guys, hope you still enjoy it! I think I'm gonna give each mom 2 chapters to explore them a bit? Still not sure, but expect at least one more chapter out by this coming Sunday! Promise!
> 
> Comments are highly appreciated, and kudos are awesome, but honestly just knowing people actually read this and enjoy it makes me super happy! Hope you all have a wonderful day!!!


	4. Thoughts to Blow Your Mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sans doesn't understand the cake recipe. Though when he goes to Carol for help, he learns more than just baking and is left more confused than before.

Bake sale. Of course it had to be a bake sale.   
  
Sans had tried to make it a raffle or a “Pay to tape someone(Linda) to the wall/hit them in the face with a pie”, but those were vetoed. These parents just didn’t know kids.   
And now he was staring at the recipe for ketchup cake/cupcakes, half confused and half contemplating burning the paper just out of spite. What did they mean by softened butter? Did Linda plan the bake sale and the recipe just to test him? Did “beat” mean he had to use a mixer? What would Tori think if he asked for help making a recipe he’d been given by Linda?

…Well he had been meaning to ask Carol if she was alright after the elevator incident…   
Looking up her number from the phone book, he called her immediately.

“Hello?”  
“Hey, Carol?”  
“Sans? How did-”  
“Phone book, hey I need help understanding this cake recipe and-“  
“I’m busy decorating cookies, bring your recipe and ingredients over you can use my oven.” She ended with a click, giving him no room to decline.

…

When he got there, he heard the sound of children playing, obviously in the back yard. Ringing the doorbell, he thankfully made out her yell of “Come in!” from the kitchen and let himself inside.   
The kitchen was pretty spacious and the large dining room table was full of star and heart shaped sugar cookies. Half of the stars were frosted with beautiful blue and purple swirled together, looking like galaxies. Carol sat at one of the chairs, frosting more as he entered.   
  
Looking out the large window over the sink, he could see her four kids playing what looked to be soccer in the back yard. He watched for a little, flicking his wrist a moment when the ball nearly collided with the goalie’s head. A little magic saved the kid a bloody nose, and Sans felt a little better about coming. Kaiti, the eldest who was playing goalie, usually invited Frisk over to play ever since they weren’t accepted into either the girls’ or boys’ soccer team.   
  
“I would’ve invited Frisk too if I’d known they were all going to go play and leave me with all the work.” Carol commented with a laugh.   
  
“They’re off at the movies with Alphys today anyways, but appreciate the thought.” Sans said, laying his ingredients down on the counter. “The galaxy look is fantastic by the way. Simply out of this world.”  
  
“That was just an excuse to make a pun, wasn’t it?” Carol asked with a roll of her eyes. She got up to grab him a couple bowls and spoons.  
  
“Only half. Now uh. How do you soften butter?”  
  
“By leaving it out of the fridge for a bit, as you have from the walk over. Just mix your ingredients… ahh here you’re gonna need a mixer, let me just wash off the mixers…”  
  
“You really are different outside of the PTA, huh?”  
  
“What?” She said, looking up at him, still washing off the metal pieces to the mixer.   
  
“You aren’t…” He stopped, not sure of what word to use. Mean? Cruel? Treating me like a dangerous outsider? Talking down to me? But was that ever actually her? Or was it just the others that she went along with?  
  
“You deserve to be treated better than you have been… I’m sorry it took so long for me to see that.” She said, turning off the water and drying them.   
  
“What convinced you?” He asked, a slight sneer in his voice as he started mixing ingredients together.   
  
“You helped me through a panic attack… But you’re right, you deserve basic hu- um. Basic decency. Even if you hadn’t.”  
  
“Darn right.” He said with a little less anger.   
  
“Um. So is there any way that… to make human food into magic food? I know you said bake sales would alienate monsters because they can’t absorb them… And my kids were just asking me if I knew how to make it so their monster friends could eat them too.”  
  
“We can still eat it. It’s just that some monsters don’t like to use the bathroom. But yeah, all you gotta do is imbue some of your essence into the food and it converts from chemical energy to magic energy.”  
  
“So you’re saying it’s a monster thing.”   
  
“It’s a monster thing.” Sans said with an amiable shrug. “Once I’m done with my cupcakes, let me know which ones you want to be magic and I’ll do it for you.”   
  
“You can do it after they’re baked?”  
  
“You can do it midway through their eating it. It’s not too difficult.”  
  
They worked the next half hour in relative silence, taking a break after a while to bring the kids some drinks. Kaiti asked if Frisk had also come over and Derek had demanded they come over the next day after school. Apparently he only won when Frisk joined his team. With him being the second youngest at 9 years old, it made sense.  
  
Carol knowingly retreated before he began on his soccer pun tirade. By the time the kids were “ball-ing their eyes out” in laughter, he heard a ding of the oven signaling that his first batch was done.   
“You’re pretty different outside the PTA yourself.” Carol said as he reentered the kitchen. She had taken out his cupcakes and put in the second batch already.   
  
“How so?” Sans hummed.   
  
“You’re good with kids. Even human kids.”  
  
“You assumed I wasn’t? I’m literally Frisk’s-“   
  
“Well yes, but we all know Frisk is the exception in most cases. I suppose someone has to look after the monsters, but… some of the parents believed you wanted to worsen conditions for the human children out of spite.”   
  
“I have literally never proposed anything that could do that at all.”  
  
“Yes, well…” she shrugged, avoiding his gaze. “Some of us fear you, you know? And it’s hard to see the humanity- err you know what I mean- in someone that you fear.”  
  
“You were scared of me?”   
  
“Sans you are a skeleton.”  
  
“Yes?”  
  
“The thing we become when we die.”  
  
“As I’ve heard.”  
  
“Look if a bunch of dust gathered together and started walking around in human shape-“  
  
“That is preposterous and terrifying.”  
  
“That’s how we feel about you! Or. Felt.”  
  
Sans remained silent for a moment. Sure, he’d seen people scared of him, and he knew that under all the skin and muscle, humans looked like him. But he had assumed people were afraid of skeletons just as they were any monster. History of war and all that jazz. Sure skeletons were a symbol of death in their culture, but so were ghosts!   
  
“I’m only saying. If it weren’t for you helping me the other day and Linda saying-“  
  
“Wait Linda?” Sans turned quickly from the cupcakes he’d been decorating.   
  
“She’s had quite a change of heart about you, but you didn’t hear it from me.” Carol said with a wink.   
  
Sans exuded an air of downright confusion, but seeing as how she was human and thus blind to the wonders of magic, he had to remind himself to voice his confusion.  
  
A baffled mashup of “wait” and “what” waging a war amongst his sputters adequately conveyed his emotions.  
  
“Now I’m just a rampant gossiper,” Carol said, quoting his words from who knows how long ago, “But I pride myself in knowing when a friend of mine has a crush~”  
  
“Crushing the opposition is the only crush Linda understands.” He said out of habit.   
  
“More like crushing on the opposition. Did you know she first met her ex-husband at a car bash. I remember it like yesterday, her dress fluttering around as she wailed on that car with a sledgehammer. See there was a competition on who could break off the door first, and she was determined to beat him.”  
  
“No. No hold on. You’re telling me that Linda beat up a car with a sledgehammer?”  
  
“In a dress and heels, yes.”  
  
“Why?” Sans asked, exasperated as once again his world was turned inside out.   
  
“People do weird things at frat parties. Or college in general.” Carol said, returning her attention to her work to whip up more frosting.   
  
“I’m gonna pretend I heard none of that.” Sans said softly.  
  
“Pretend as you like, I just thought I’d let you know your words have more bite now.”  
  
“How so?”  
  
“Linda. Has. A. Crush. On. You.” She said.   
  
“So I gotta be nice to her because she wants in on the bone zone?” Sans said.   
  
“I’m gonna pretend I didn’t hear that.” Carol deadpanned. “No, but maybe don’t bring up her ex when she’s actually agreeing with you? She was really upset over that.”  
  
“Oh. Right.” Sans said, cursing himself inwardly. Once again he felt that damn need to apologize to someone who he… he despised. He did despise her, right? But he had despised all of them, including Carol. And now Carol was practically a friend. And he’d noticed the lot of them not shutting him out as often, finding actual legitimate flaws in his ideas instead of outright ignoring them, hearing him out more… Hearing him and the other monsters out more.   
  
But. Just because they were trying to be better, did he really have to forgive them? Did he want to forgive them? Did you have to forgive someone to apologize for your own mistakes? No. So it was just his pride, then.   
  
“I’ll see if I can talk with her next time I see her.” Sans said after noticing the silence that had piled up like fancy paperweights on an important document.  
  
“Glad to hear it! I do hope we can all be more amiable now. It’s no fun being at each other’s throats all the time.”  
  
His eye flickered blue and yellow for a moment. A knife. A knife charging towards him, swirls of rancid dust, the bitter taste of determination drowning out the twinges of anguish and turmoil that flourished in both souls at battle. Desperation vs determination… patience wearing thin… never trust a human.  
A hand gently nudged the tip of his fingers. When met with no resistance or pulling away, fingers interlaced with his bones and he looked unseeing towards the human-towards Carol, illuminated by an increasingly rapid yellow to cyan shifting light.   
  
“Breathe with me.” She said gently.  
  
And so he did, though it was more the gentle motions of expanding and contracting of his rib cage than anything to do with air. The motion was comforting nevertheless, and between his breathing and the hand upon his, he once again grounded himself in this timeline. In this reality.   
  
“Thank you.” Sans said quietly as she let go of his hand.   
  
“You can thank me with some magic cookies, dear.”   
  
“Buck.” He corrected.   
  
“Ass.”   
  
“MOM!!” Human or monster, a child always knew when to show up to catch a parent swearing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So it was brought to my attention I hadn't updated this in like a year. I've had the beginning of this chapter just laying around since that time... Well I guess since there's still interest, let's see where this leads.   
> I went to a car bash my freshman year in a dress and let me tell you. Being in makeup and a long dress and swinging around a sledgehammer is one of my proudest moments. So why not shove that onto Linda but pretend it's one of her embarrassing secrets? :D
> 
> Anyone got any ideas for names of Carol's other three kids? I'm taking suggestions.   
> (and I would love any comments you throw my way. Even if it's only a smily face. Especially if it's a smily face. I'll respond with one back!)


End file.
